|Jolly good tweet, old man.|
Yes, it's true. Just moments ago, I sent my first tweet.
Beamed from the deepest reaches of the solar system from a powerful transmitter located at my sprawling villa on Planet X, my tweet, four little words hurtled toward Earth with all the speed and power of a meteor the size of Rhone Island (our smallest state, yes, but understand that a meteor that size, should it strike our planet, heaven forbid, would cause devastation on a biblical scale). Feel a sudden impact? That was my tweet. Part fiction, part fantasy, 100% McBone.
Unless you count yourself among my followers (latest tally: 1), you missed it. Too bad. It was McBoneriffic.
I'm not sure what I hope to accomplish with this move, other than satisfy my unrelenting need to be on the cutting edge, but I'm sure my first tweet shall not be my last. I know I risk being seen as a 'sellout' to the many McBoners who would prefer that we 'keep it real.' Understand, dear reader, that, in the face of changing technology and rampant narcissism, we hold true to our ideals. Though paradigms shift and tweets fly by the billion, we will ask the robot who makes our sandwich, as we once asked the pimply teen, to kindly hold the mayo.