Thursday, April 12, 2012

Biden, the Bard and the Buckeye State

Last week our Poet Laureate ditched his usual combat fatigues and steel-toed boots and tucked a blue shirt into a crisp pair of newly ironed khakis.  Not just anything could persuade our #1 scribe to shower, shave and comb his hair in the same week, but then again it's not every day that Vice President Joe Biden drops by your remote compound in western Ohio to spend an afternoon.

Though the nature of the relationship between the lifelong Democrat and the militaristic poet/recluse/libertarian remains murky, it is believed that, in exchange for delivering a crucial swing state in November, the Bard had ready a list of demands for the next four years that he presented at a private conference in sub-level 14:
  • Individual mandate to purchase assault rifle
  • Phrase 'It's Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve' worked into pledge of allegiance
  • No abortions for anyone ever
  • No dog abortions
  • Apologize to South for Emancipation Proclamation's overreach
  • Abolish the Fed, the Treasury, the IRS, fiat currency and all spending except military
  • Pizza Hut for lunch
Here's the VP surrounded by Foliglio, various security personnel, several of the poet's wives and a handful of his 30 children:

"OK kids, lunch is on Uncle Joe!"

"No, no, no...THIN crust.  Uh-huh, right."

"Whaddya mean you're out of breadsticks?"
After wolfing some 'za, Foliglio commemorated the occasion by reading a piece from his seminal collection, 1982's Diz-aster Book of Poems, marking the first time the poet has read from his own work since the second wedding of Lyndon LaRouche.

The itch a call it

     Srach, srach, srach,
Srach srach and srach
were bing atacked by the
itch a call it (srach)  He makes
you itch like (srach) crazy
and you will srach, srach,
srach, srach, srach, srach
srach, srach and srach


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