Born: October 3, 1975 in Akron, Ohio
Cavities: 0
Infections: 0
Broken Bones: 0
Braces: No
Glasses: No
Sprained ankles: 3
Lactose intolerance: Oh my, yes
Vegetarian, 1993-1997
Lice: 4th grade
Chicken pox: 3rd grade
Worms: No
Total girlfriends: 16
Imaginary girlfriends: 15
Wives: 1
Friends: 7 (including Mother)
Times beaten up by sister: 153
Tattoos: 0
Times thrown up: 37
High school popularity rating: 13%
Post-adolescent bed-wettings: 1
Accidental Mayonnaise Ingestions (AMIs): 7
Non-Accidental Mayonnaise Ingestions (NAMIs): 2
Foreign language fluency: Elvish
Length, Adam's apple: 3.5"
NOML Moustache championships: 1 (2007)
Tennis championships: 1 (2008 Australian Open)
nwb
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